alcohol warnings...lol

[thecleaninglady]

Liquor manufacturers have accepted the
Government's suggestion that the
following warning labels be placed
immediately on all varieties of alcohol:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may leave you wondering what the hell
happened to your bra and panties.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may make you think you are whispering
when you are not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may cause you to tell your friends over
and over again that you love them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may cause you to think you can sing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may lead you to believe that ex-lovers
are really dying for you to telephone
them at four in the morning.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better
looking than most people.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may lead you to think people are
laughing WITH you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may make you think you have mystical
Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting
your a$$ kicked.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may cause you to roll over in the
morning and see something really scary.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WARNING: The crumsumpten of alcohol
may Mack you tink you kan tpye reel gode.

[Truth]

Oh, I'm not guilty of any of those!